Tuesday, April 8, 2008

I had a Dream...

Sunday night I had a bad dream. I couldn't do caijiao. And then everyone was standing around and Sifu cancelled class. He told me if anyone showed up that night then I should teach class. How can someone who doesn't know caijiao teach class?! I looked around frantically for some way out, but I couldn't leave because class was being held at the Hamptons....

Taking a psychoanalytic view of this dream, I would say - I'm a dork. Kung fu is supposed to ALLEVIATE stress, not invade my subconscious and disturb my hours of rest. That's the time for my OTHER anxieties to invade my subconscious. And why am I stressing for testing? Nothing is hanging on it. and even if something was, it doesn't matter. As Mo put it last night, as per Heng Nai, "Kung fu has no meaning, and no purpose." Instead of being depressing I found this very comforting. I mean Buddhism's base tenet is no attachment, so it's kind of antithetical to get worked up over my "action meditation." So to say kung fu has no meaning and no purpose is not to discount it specifically, but a reminder that just like all things in life, it is transitory and it's bad to get wrapped up in it, just like getting wrapped up in money, or people or any of those other things I've let stress me out and give me bad dreams.... Dinosaurs... outer space... high school calculus... Here's hoping now I can get back to having those nightmares instead.... Actually, here's hoping now I can have those dreams only now I know kung fu and can defeat the dinosaurs, or calculus, or whatever....

7 comments:

  1. Weird! I had a similar dream/nightmare as well. I could only do caijiao with half of the flexibility I could normally do them. I must have some anxiety issues anyhow. :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. that's not true!

    kung fu has a purpose!

    it enables me to eat more cupcakes.

    ReplyDelete
  3. "Are you afraid of this happiness?"
    -Buddha

    ReplyDelete
  4. i have to agree with sucheela on this one. as far as the meaning of the dream, it probably has less to do with kung fu and testing than general things in your life, the people and places probably represent things. but i'm not an expert.

    and yea i can't wait to party at georgica again.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh and as far as Georgica ... I call bed!!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. On Sunday Sifu told someone to practice something in their sleep - either a basic or part of erluquan. Anyone remember? "It's good for you."

    Well, it's time to train sleepy style. More sleep, dream harder!

    ReplyDelete